The power of forming connections: Age UK

By Ruth Lowe, Head of Loneliness Services at Age UK

I’m Ruth, Head of Loneliness Services at Age UK. I oversee the delivery of our national support services for older people experiencing loneliness – including The Silver Line Helpline, a 24-hour phone line, offering conversation, comfort, and companionship, any time of the day or night.

We regularly hear from callers who feel lonely and unsure of how to reconnect with the world around them. But every day I hear stories from our teams about how older people’s lives have been transformed by our services – proof of the incredible power that friendship and human connection can have in helping people rediscover joy and purpose.

My journey with Age UK

My journey with Age UK began 16 years ago, when I volunteered as a befriender through the local Age UK in my area. Having lost my own beloved Nan, I wanted to form a new connection with an older person. Spending time with my befriendee, who didn’t have many other people in their life, opened my eyes to the challenges many older people face.

That experience sparked a deep desire to make a difference, and in 2011, I started my first role at Age UK. Over the past 14 years, I’ve worked across various aspects of our services- starting with direct support roles and eventually moving into service development and management. Along the way, I’ve collaborated with brilliant colleagues across the organisation to shape our loneliness offering.

Age UK’s approach to loneliness is multi-faceted: we not only deliver services but also lead research, campaign for policy change, and work with a network of amazing local Age UKs who offer a wide range of support to older people in their community - all aimed at reducing loneliness and changing lives.

Ruth Lowe, Head of Loneliness Services at Age UK

Older people and loneliness

It’s fantastic that the stigma around loneliness has reduced. However, I believe that many older people still find it hard to speak about how they’re feeling. In fact, 1.1 million say they feel embarrassed about being lonely[i]. While much of the public conversation has recently focused on loneliness among younger people, it’s vital we don’t overlook older people and that their voices are heard in equal measure.

For many older people, loneliness is triggered by major life changes such as bereavement, retirement, or taking on caring responsibilities. As we age, our social circles often naturally shrink, and health or mobility challenges can make it harder to get out and meet others. External factors also play a role—communities that aren’t age-friendly, poor public transport, and a lack of accessible public spaces all contribute. Digital exclusion adds another layer, cutting many older people off from the online world where so much connection now happens.

While most people experience occasional loneliness, nearly a million older people feel lonely often[ii] - and for some, that loneliness becomes chronic. When left unaddressed, it can create a downward spiral, harming both mental and physical health and deepening feelings of isolation even further. Many feel they’ve simply disappeared from view. At Age UK, we’re here to remind them that they are valued, and they matter—and to help them find their way back to themselves.

The power of connection

We know that truly addressing loneliness means helping people form meaningful, lasting connections. That’s exactly what our Telephone Friendship Service is designed to do. We match older people with trained volunteers for a weekly phone chat - offering conversation, friendship, and a vital link to the outside world. Our team is always on hand to support both the older person and their volunteer, ensuring a positive and enriching experience for both.

We carefully create matches based on shared interests, hobbies, and life experiences. When someone joins the service, we start by making short introductory calls to get to know them better, so we can find a friend they’re likely to genuinely connect with. It’s a safe, simple, and accessible way for older people to build a new friendship - all from the comfort of their own home.

When people are first referred to us, they’re often low in confidence. Some are convinced they have nothing interesting to say, or that no one would want to listen. But our experienced team knows how to gently draw people out and help them rediscover the joy of conversation.

Once they’re matched, many older people find their confidence growing week by week. The support of a telephone friend can make a profound difference and the impact is remarkable. In our latest survey, 96% of older people told us the calls made them feel less lonely, and 90% told us that since having the calls, something positive had changed in their lives – this could be that they’ve felt more motivated, confident, or done something new they wouldn’t have done before – such as starting a new hobby or interest.

Loneliness can deeply affect an older person’s self-esteem and confidence – and having even small connections with others can help remind them that they matter. We regularly speak with older people who haven’t spoken to another human for days. During the call, you can hear the change in their voice - watching them come alive as they open up, laugh, and share again.

Ruth's telephone friend, Roy.

My telephone friend Roy

One of the greatest joys of my time at Age UK has been becoming telephone friends with Roy. We were matched through the Telephone Friendship Service, and our friendship lasted six and a half years. Roy had recently lost his wife - his partner of more than 50 years - and was struggling to adjust to life without her. The loneliness he felt was immense.

Roy didn’t change as a person during the course of the time we knew each other, but our friendship did. At first, our conversations were light - chatting about what he’d be doing that week. But over time, our friendship deepened, and we could talk about anything. As Roy’s confidence returned, he became an Age UK storyteller, courageously sharing his experiences in our campaigns to help others facing similar feelings of loneliness.

Through this journey, new opportunities opened up for Roy. He got a tablet - something he found challenging to use at first, but he was determined to learn. He joined a choir, which became a huge part of his life, right up until the pandemic.

Roy passed away in January 2022, and I felt a huge loss. He will always hold a special place in my heart - not just as a beloved friend, but as someone who showed me, and so many others, the incredible power of reaching out for support and building a bond that can change a life. It meant a lot to Roy that others had found hope and connection through the work he did with us.

Seeking support

We can all play our part in making sure our communities are more welcoming to older people. Checking in regularly with older relatives, friends and neighbours – even just a small gesture such as a smile in a stranger’s direction - can make a big difference.

We can also speak openly about loneliness. It’s a normal human emotion, and by being honest about our own experiences, we can help break the stigma that still surrounds it—especially for older people.

Please help us spread the word about Age UK. We offer a wide range of local and national services to support older people who are feeling lonely. We’ve also recently released a helpful guide for those struggling with loneliness - developed with input from older people who’ve lived through it themselves.

Our work wouldn’t be possible without public support. Whether through donations, volunteering, or joining our campaigns—there are many ways to get involved.

Finally, if you or an older person you know is feeling lonely, please reach out. Whether it’s to a friend, family member, GP, or Age UK—we’re here for you. Speaking up can be hard, but it’s a brave first step toward feeling connected again.

Age UK’s free national telephone services can be a lifeline for those who feel as though they have no-one else to turn to.

For more information about the Charity’s Information & Advice Line, Telephone Friendship Service and The Silver Line Helpline, as well as what’s available at local Age UKs, visit: www.ageuk.org.uk/loneliness/, and become a volunteer by visiting https://www.ageuk.org.uk/get-involved/volunteer/.

[i] Age UK calculation based on data (weighted to be representative of the UK population) from Yonder online and telephone polling for Age UK, November 2024 (weighted sample of 2755 people aged 65+ in the UK, between 2nd and 29th October 2024) and ONS mid-year 2023 population estimates (published 8th October 2024).

[ii] Age UK analysis of data drawn from wave 14 of the UK Household Longitudinal Study (Understanding Society), collected in 2022-24. Estimates for the age 65+ population of the UK who are often lonely are scaled up using Office for National Statistics mid-year population estimates for 2023 to give an estimate of the number of older people who are often lonely.